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Japan Tours and Life Style

10 Shocking things Foreign Men found after getting married in Japan

Japan is the most developed Asian country, and as you may have imagined, for getting married in japan there are plenty of attractive women who appear exactly like the dolls you see on television.

As Japan’s society becomes more internationalized, an increasing number of residents are choosing to marry someone from another country. It’s easy to see why, because interracial relationships can be the most fulfilling and profound type of cultural interchange. Marrying a Japanese lady is not as difficult as you might assume, although it is more difficult than marrying a woman from another Asian country.

There is no such thing as a perfect husband, though.

If you have a plan to get married in japan then you must check out, The problems that foreign men have faced in combining their own habits and traditions with those of their Japanese brides are listed below.

 

  • Japanese Women take their Culture very seriously.

japanese-cultural-women
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Unless you married in japan solely to have exotic kid genes, chances are you don’t think of your partner as “foreign,” but rather as someone you like enough to want to spend the rest of your life with. All of this seems good and natural, but there are dangers of dismissing cultural differences. After all, Japan has its own set of conventions and etiquette laws, which you can be sure will apply to your honey’s home country as well. Japan’s culture is deeply rooted in tradition.

While this may come as a surprise to many who think of Japan as a sophisticated high-tech culture populated with robots and the like, many businesses still operate traditionally. Job and university applications, for example, are still completed by hand, and the fax machine is still widely utilized throughout the country. Maintain an open mind when it comes to your partner’s culture. Learn to respect the traditions and practices of others. Always be kind and polite, appear on time for scheduled meetings, and avoid being overly loud in public. To make an international marriage work, you’ll need extra patience and understanding, but you can learn a lot about yourself and your partner in the process.

 Hard to communicate 

Getting married in japan may come with a communication problem. Men and women are inherently different. Communication becomes considerably more difficult when they must use a common language. In some languages, there will be syn-taxes and words that make no sense, preventing you from properly expressing yourself.

What are the options for dealing with this issue? Easy! Look for a female that is fluent in English. Discover some Japanese while you learn more about her culture. It will not only be fun, but it will also be beneficial to your relationship.

 

  • She is passive-aggressive

Conflict is avoided in Japanese society. As a result, some women may be passive hostile and let you down when you least expect it. Even if they secretly think you’re a moron, women will be polite to you. Even if you have no chance, they will smile at you as you approach them. That is why you should never judge a book by its cover.

Manipulation is the term used in the Western world to describe this. It is absolutely usual in Japan. Even if she is already your girlfriend, she may use manipulation to prevent problems.

 

  • She is boring

If you decide to get married in Japan then learn how to chat with Japanese women, make sure you spend time getting to know them better. Although this is not a general rule, Japanese culture supports long work hours. Students stay late at school, whereas adults work a lot of overtime – they work even when there is nothing to do.

Furthermore, Japanese coworkers drink a few times a month. In the long term, leisure time is nearly non-existent. As a result, residents do not have true hobbies because they never have the time to pursue them. When your life revolves solely around work, eating, and sleeping, your personality may become monotonous.

japanese-working-style
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  • The language barrier is a big deal

Many variations exist while tying the married with a foreign partner. When marrying a Japanese partner, you must deal with the language issue in particular.

Even if you learn each other’s language, there will be instances when you misunderstand each other or are unable to communicate exactly what you want to express. It will be irritating at times, but with patience and understanding, you will be able to get through it. This might also help to enhance your relationship. If you intend to live in Japan with your partner for a long time, studying the Japanese language is an excellent idea. Being able to communicate in Japanese can make your life in Japan easier to manage, and it can also open up additional work opportunities for you.

Language acquisition or practice is the foundation of many intercultural partnerships between Japanese women and their non-Japanese partners. Maybe you’re language exchange partners or you’re a tutor and a student. Of course, these situations can elicit stronger emotions; yet, there are times when the dynamic reverts to student-teacher, or when time spent together feels like a lesson or exhausting and superficial, rather than profound and mutually understanding. Be careful not to be a token English (or another language) speaker, and don’t look for a Japanese wife solely to improve your Japanese language skills!

 

  • If she flies away with the children to her home country, she’s most likely to get custody of the children

Japanese-law-book
[source]
When you get married in Japan, parental rights are granted to either the mother or the father, not both, according to the Civil Code. Joint custody is prohibited, and courts have a history of favoring the mother 80 to 90% of the time. When a parent does not receive custody of their child, it is common for them to never see their child again. Many women refuse to allow visitation, even if it can be arranged informally between the parents.

With motherhood raised to such an art form, it’s difficult to see why women would want to forego a profession in child-rearing in favour of Japanese corporate culture, which values long working hours, work over family, and poor wages–the actual culprits in Japan’s dearth of full-time female employees.

It would be inaccurate to claim that a man is incapable of parenting a child in the United States. But that’s because our jobs and families have distinct work-life balances. The work-life balance in Japan is more distinct: men work and women balance.

  • The monetary problem

Several times on the list, respondents indicate a thrifty woman who foregoes fancy clothing and store-bought food and drink in favour of less expensive products fits their picture of being domestic. Once again, there are most likely two sides to this story. On the one hand, it’s fairly uncommon for Japanese women to cease working after having children, and for males facing the prospect of being the family’s main provider, having a wife with moderately priced tastes minimizes the quantity of bread they’ll need to win.

A traditional Japanese woman’s husband must be financially solid, so men getting married in japan must be working in a respected, secure position with decent pay and a strong social status. The guy is more likely to be expected to be the main, if not the exclusive, breadwinner, especially if you are considering extending your family. When going out, the man may be expected to cover all expenses. Japanese women aren’t used to splitting the bill after marriage, according to tradition.

 

  • She becomes more of a mother figure and less of a wife-figure after having children

[source]
One more thing you need to keep in mind, if you get married in japan is that a Japanese mother devotes herself entirely to her children’s upbringing, education, and household management. This is something she is quite proud of. Bonding with children (i.e., being present all of the time), educating them (kindergarten begins at three years old), as well as the typical child-minding, cooking nutritious meals, and taking care of children’s health, are all prioritized.

She devotes herself entirely to caring for her children in every manner. Japanese mothers spend hours preparing the perfect cute preschool meal for their children. She follows school instructions on everything from putting permanent name tags to every personal item to ensuring that youngsters greet each other, their instructors, and their elders properly once they start kindergarten.

 

  • Japanese women are much more independent than you may think

Japanese encourage individuals to work part-time from a young age, especially university students. Whether or whether they are university students, most women try to find a part-time job or a job after high school because they are no longer “as dependant” on their parents. Whether they still live with their parents or not, and whether or not their parents force them to work, most of them feel compelled to participate in the labour force (whether arubaito, haken, or freeter) for Japan to flourish as a community. As a result, you may anticipate your Japanese wife to be self-sufficient (especially when it comes to you) and preoccupied with her profession. If you want to know more about types of women in japan then click here.

 

  • Managing all the family finances

It’s no secret that Japan consistently ranks last in international gender gap studies. In 2012, the World Economic Forum placed Japan 101 in terms of women’s economic and political engagement. In 2013, Japan ranked 105th out of 135 countries in terms of gender equality, trailing Burkina Faso. You may think that, based on these data, Japan isn’t a very nice country for women, but i. While there are significant gender disparities in the job, economy, and politics, others claim that Japanese women have “too much” authority in other areas of society.

It should come as no surprise that when such a woman is in charge of the family if you get married in japan, she is also in charge of the finances when she marries. The husband should hand over his earnings to his wife, who will handle all of the household expenses and provide him a monthly allowance of roughly $500. Women do indeed rule the roost here. She also maintains her own “secret” bank account, which she adds to every month to meet her personal expenses, a rare splurge, or even to build a retirement fund.

 

Overview and conclusion

Others claim that to get marry is one of the most stressful events in one’s life. What’s more, what if your spouse is from another country? With all of the regulations and paperwork to consider, it might take a lot of your time, money, and effort. While foreign weddings are becoming more prevalent and widespread, the expectations and realities of international marriages might differ greatly. Of course, this is highly reliant on individual situations and personalities. However, up to 40% of overseas marriages are estimated to end in divorce.

Thankfully, the failure of foreign partnerships is more frequently than not caused by cultural differences. These are usually overcomeable for long-term spouses, and compromises go a long way. The realities of overseas marriages’ practical and compatibility difficulties, on the other hand, can be more difficult to overcome. It could be a logistical issue — living with someone whose house is halfway around the world from yours can pose issues when it comes to deciding where to raise children or when you or your parents reach retirement age. Money might also be a concern, as foreign connections necessitate extra travel and relocation costs.

However, it has the potential to be one of your most gratifying and memorable experiences. It will always be worth it, in the end, to settle down in the country with your Japanese companion!

 

 

 

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